One True Religion?

My partner sent me this jem from the Richmond Times-Dispatch today.
I’m at a loss.  Is this Howard Grimwood a religious zealot or a decent satirist?  (“Decent” being high praise.)  I’m leaning toward the latter as no specific religion is mentioned.    
Mom, Dad Taught One True Religion
Editor, Times-Dispatch: Luckily, I was born into the one true religion. My [...]

Short Cuts

Procrastination has long been a beloved hobby of mine.  I was once so overwhelmed by the reading I had to do for my “senior capstone class” for my BA in English that I counted up the pages of the required reading for the semester instead of actually reading.  I stopped counting at 3,000 pages.  The class [...]

Meditation on leaving, part one

I don’t like loud, I’m still hungry because I didn’t eat my cold lobster, why did I order lobster again? I don’t know anyone here, I want a hot dog, or maybe a creme brulee, what the fuck did that woman next to me just say to me?  I can’t hear a goddamned thing over DRUNK PEOPLE [...]

Am I missing something?

I had a lovely weekend in beautiful Roanoke, Virginia, home of drug addled weathermen.  I got an earful of scuttlebutt when I swung downtown.   Apparently, the townspeople were all a-twitter over the recent firing of Jamey Singleton.  Singleton, a local weatherman was spared the axe after copping to heroin addiction months ago, only to get fired over a former [...]

Dirty John’s Grocery

I broke a glass tonight.  I had a premonition of breaking it a few weeks back.  Given my considerable grace, the word “premonition” is poorly chosen.  It was not so much a psychic vision of breaking this exact glass as it was a realization of the inevitability that some day, someone in my household would break that [...]

Disenfranchised in Virginia

As I mentioned in my middle of the night mumbings, I was not on the books in my precinct, and I was in good company.  I live in an area where a large majority of votes went to Webb, a speck of blue in a sea of red, so it really pissed me off to [...]

Congratulations, Madam Speaker

I went to bed 2 hours ago, but I couldn’t sleep.  VA looks like it will go to a recount, and I’ll maintain my optimism that both Montana and Missouri remain in play.
House Speaker Pelosi.  Well I’ll be a suck egg mule.
In other election news, it appears Chelsea Clinton and I shared similar experiences at [...]

Lit nerds and vanity

From an e-mail I wrote today to a friend:
Honestly, my love of all things simple language-wise is more a function of my own cognitive limitations than any steadfast belief that simple language is superior to complex.  I had one professor in college who could weave history, language, literature, and science seamlessly.  He would start a lecture [...]

Confidential to Andrew Sullivan

Mr. Sullivan:
One of my siblings introduced me to you years ago, and I read your prolific blog quite regularly for a spell.  Those were the days where I was triangulating my world news through regular reading of The Economist, The Guardian, and The Christian Science Monitor, taking great pride in my diligent efforts to get truly balanced [...]

Too soon

I’m not sure when the time is right for a recently-wed to begin making “now you’re stuck with me unless we get a lawyer involved” jokes in public.  I’m pretty sure the morning after the wedding is too soon.